You're Gonna Miss This

Tayler has been struggling with fussiness at night time. I have refused to claim that it is colic. However, she appears to get fussy and start screaming/crying about 6:30PM and it stops about 9:30PM/10:30PM. Now, I will say this-- she is an amazing sleeper. Once she falls asleep at 9:30PM/10:30PM, she doesn't wake up again til about 3:30AM, then not again til about 6:30-8:00AM. She lets us sleep in periods and it is amazing... it's just getting through this screaming/crying period we have at night time.

I'll be honest with you here... I have been getting frustrated. It has been going on for about 2 weeks... and it is really starting to wear on me. Our nights are spent driving around, playing music... trying to keep her occupied. I find myself crying through most of the car ride... praying that God would give her some kind of peace. I don't get angry with her or anything like that. I know she can't help it. I just get frustrated because I can't help her :( I try and try, but it just doesn't work...

Tonight, I put her in the car and drove around with her trying to get her to calm down. We'd been driving for almost an hour and she was still crying... I broke down.. I just didn't know what to do for her anymore and then the songs on my Ipod changed... to "You're Gonna Miss This."

In this song, Trace Adkins sings:

"Five years later there's a plumber workin' on the water heater
Dog's barkin', phone's ringin'
One kid's cryin', one kid's screamin'
She keeps apologizin'
He says they don't bother me
I've got 2 babies of my own
One's 36, one's 23
Huh, it's hard to believe

But you're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this
You're gonna miss this
Yeah, you're gonna miss this"

And of course, I cried even more.

This is a trying time right now. It wears on you, but I know... that when she's 18 years old.. walking across that stage to graduate.. I'm going to miss those car rides... I'm going to miss rocking her to sleep and singing to her even through the screams. I'm going to miss blaring Kari Jobe and singing at the top of my lungs because that's the only way she stops at times. I'm going to miss holding her... period.

God, forgive me for getting frustrated sometimes. Forgive me for forgetting that these are precious moments.. even when they are trying. Let me remember that one day, I'll miss this... so let me not wish that it would leave.. just give me the strength to get through it. Let me take those times and embrace them. Let me learn to enjoy them... even when it is hard.

What Scentsy Offers for YOU!!

What does Scentsy have to offer you personally?!
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American Idol Recap

I thought I'd take some time to do an American Idol recap as well :) Here's who I think is staying, who is in the bottom 3, and who is going home. Ready? Set... Go!

 

 

Jacob Lusk- I know this is probably going to sound mean, but I think we've seen all we can see from him. We know his style, but it doesn't shock me anymore. He doesn't change things up very often and I just think his performances are getting boring. Definitely bottom 3. (He was last week too, so I think America just might agree with me on this one!)

Lauren Alaina- She's good. Never been in the bottom 3. America loves her (including Steven Tyler ;)) She's safe. By a long shot.

Scotty McCreery- Some could argue that what I said about Jacob is true for Scotty. He sticks to what he knows, but there's a difference-- Scotty SHOCKS me. I cannot believe he's 16 years old and sounds like Josh Turner. IMPRESSIVE. He's safe (especially if all the 13 year old girls are voting... haha!)

James Durbin-- Well, Randy Jackson seems to think he could win this whole competition, so I think it's fair to assume... he's safe.

Casey Abrams-- While I like Casey.. based on all other performances, I think he's in the bottom 3 tonight. No, I don't think he's headed home, but I think he's 'earned' a spot right there.

Haley Rinehart-- While my husband drools every time she walks onto the stage, haha, I think she's in the bottom 3 yet again tonight. She has been there the past few weeks and I think that's where she'll stay. But no, I don't think she's headed home.

So recap here. Bottom 3:

Jacob, Casey, and Haley

Going home?

Jacob.

We'll see if I'm accurate. Last week.. I was right on (and that's never happened before LOL)

Blog Challenge- Day 6

If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?  Any kind of work I can do at home, so I can earn some money and be a GREAT house wife and mommy! (I'm not saying women who work outside of the home aren't great house wives and mommies, please don't get me wrong! :)) I just WANT to be at home and still earn some money :) I know there are some people that can't stay at home every day... and that's perfectly fine! We should all be seeking what makes US happy as individuals :) For me-- I wouldn't be happy and satisfied leaving the house every morning and working 8-5. I just wasn't born for that... This is what I LOVE to do. I feel the richest I've ever been even though I (personally) have no money in my bank account. I LOVE being at home and watching Tayler grow. PLUS, I LOVE being a Scentsy consultant knowing I can eventually make some money! :) If you're interested in reading anyone else's, here is some ladies I know that are also participating! :)

Emily
Brittany
Taryn

Enjoy!

A Look at Mommy Life... Week 4 :) (Project 52)

As of 2:22AM today... I've been at this whole 'Mommy' thing for 4 weeks. Yes, Tayler is 4 weeks old TODAY. My oh my how time flies! Like seriously. I know I say that every week, but I cannot even begin to stress how true it is. I cannot believe that in 2ish more days it will be her one month birthday.. (Well, actually, she doesn't get a 1-month birthday. Darn the whole 30 day hath September, April, June, and November thing! My daughter will only have monthly birthdays for 7 months of the year. Boo!) Here's a picture of Tayler-Bug on her 4 week birthday:

And here's a Mommy recap of life with a 4 week old:
Struggles-- She is still fussy at night time. I refuse to claim Colic. I keep pleading the blood of Jesus over her. I know that if God can heal her of cysts when I was 18-27 weeks pregnant with her, He can take care of this fussiness. It starts at about 6:30PM and lasts until about 9:30/10:00PM. She just screams and cries... constantly. The only thing that seems to soothe her (sometimes...) are car rides, holding her and walking around the house, or eating. (Which obviously we can't feed her every time she cries...) It's been trying, I'm not going to lie. It honestly just breaks my heart because I feel helpless :( It tears me up inside to see her crying and not be able to fix it for her. I try everything... the swing, a car ride, noise, play mat, her binkie... and these rarely help. Sometimes we get lucky, but most of the time, we just have to suffer through those 3-4 hours at night time. Please just pray for us and pray for her. We refuse to claim Colic.
Triumphs-- Besides those 3-4 hours at night, things have been wonderful with her! :) We had a wonderful milestone last night (and yesterday..) First of all, she napped in her crib yesterday (and put herself to sleep might I add!) for 2.5 hours... then, we put her down at 10:30PM to go to sleep in there and she slept until 3:30AM by herself in her big girl crib. I was such a proud momma (and a thankful momma! She let me sleep for 5 hours CONSECUTIVELY :)) 

Doesn't she look tiny in there? :) I couldn't be more prod of her!
Also-- she keeps trying to hold her own bottle:

She's so smart :)
I have started my own Scentsy business as an Independent Scentsy Consultant. I want to bring a little income into our family but still be able to stay home with Tayler, so this is the route I've chosen to take :) I'm hosting my Scentsy launch party on May 14th :) If you're interested in purchasing anything from it (and you can't make it) click this link: https://alyssabay.scentsy.us/Home and go to the right side of the page where it says 'Buy From Party' and purchase something! Please help me make this business successful :) Scentsy is amazing and I want to share it with all of you!
And that sums up Mommy life right now :) I'm loving every minute of it. She is SUCH a miracle and every morning I wake up and see that smile... I know it's a BLESSED DAY! :)

Blog Challenge Day 4 & 5

4.When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done?

I certainly hope so! I certainly hope that I don't just talk the talk, but that I walk the walk. It's easy to speak your dreams, but I want to be the person that accomplishes them. I think I've done that (or pretty close to that!) so far.... I've received my Master's Degree, I've wrote a book, I got married. One thing I did that I said I would never do... have a baby, haha! That's right. I contemplated having children. (I was afraid...) But SURPRISE, SURPRISE.... here's Tayler! :) But anyways, I hope that when all is said and done, I've done more than I've said...

 

5.What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world?

  I'd just like for kindness and compassion to be more prevalent. Sometimes I wish the world could go back to the "old" days... where people could leave their house unlocked all day long without worrying about being robbed. Where rape and murder were rare occasions. Where you didn't have to be afraid to walk by yourself at night.... I just wish life could be simpler in that manner... more kindness, less fear and hurt. If you're interested in reading anyone else's, here is some ladies I know that are also participating! :)

Emily
Brittany
Taryn

Enjoy!

Scentsy-- What Is It?

 Scentsy is a direct selling, wickless candle company headquartered in Meridian, Idaho. The company is owned by Orville and Heidi Thompson and sells its products through a field sales force of more than 70,000 independent sales representatives known as Independent Scentsy Consultants, who market and sell Scentsy products through home parties!I love Scentsy! It fills every room in my house.  I love money! It's needed to pay our bills.I love my family.... which made making the decision to become an Independent Scentsy Consultant that much easier!  I can work from home, plan parties with friends, host parties, and run an online Scentsy store.

Want to join my team? Click the Scentsy link on the right hand side of the screen, scroll down my Scentsy page, and click 'Join my Team.' Stay at home mommas--- this is a great opportunity for you!  You can shop at my online store here: https://alyssabay.scentsy.us/Buy  

Blog Challenge Day 3

3.If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?

There's one word I struggle to say. No, it isn't "love..", it's not "hate"... it's

NO.

This is the one word that seems to flee when I need it the most. I can't tell people "no." And that's unfortunate because it causes me to do exactly what this question is asking--- do so many things we don't like. I suppose if I say 'no' I feel selfish. (And lets be honest here-- no one likes a selfish person, right?)

Plus, I hate the look of disappointment on people's faces. I want them to like me. I have this terrible need for that. I really need to learn to be okay with uttering 'no' and going about my way with no feelings of guilt or judgment. It's just awful. If I say 'no' to someone, I go the whole day feeling sick to my stomach and struggling to regain their approval (as if I somehow lost it....)

I want to learn to say 'no.' I want to be okay with following what I WANT somedays and not doing what others want all the time. (And when I say what others want... I don't mean going out to eat where my hubby wants to somedays, etc. I'm talking about when people ask me over and over again to do favors and I want to take a nap, relax, do chores, etc.) I know that I give in all the time to doing things late at night so I don't disappoint E, but then I'm exhausted the next day because I stay up til midnight 'hanging out' all while Tayler has already had 2-3 hours of sleep... and then she's back up again at 12:30...

I have to learn that saying no is okay!! Thinking about yourself is okay sometimes! Life would be happier that way, wouldn't it??   If you're interested in reading anyone else's, here is some ladies I know that are also participating! :)

Emily
 Brittany
Taryn
Enjoy!

Tayler's First Easter

 Jesus, You know just how far the east is from the west. I don't have to see the man I've been come rising up in me again. In the arms of Your mercy I find rest, 'cause You know just how far the east is from the west..... from one scarred hand to the other... Happy Easter everyone! I know, I'm a day late, but yesterday was a tad bit busy (although it was indeed relaxing as well!) So, I'm posting our Easter update now and just you wait... wait til you see the cute little lady I had on my hands yesterday! :) We got up early, Tayler ate and started taking her early morning nap, and I got started doing things. I told Ethan.... you know you're an adult when you can't just get up, get dressed, and leave the house in the mornings, haha! I got up, sterilized her bottles, washed dishes, packed her diaper bag, got her Easter outfit out, took a shower, put cheesy potatoes in the crock pot, got dressed, fixed my hair, bathed Tayler, dressed her, fed her again before leaving, packed up the crock pot... Yes, it was kind of hectic, but we did it  haha! :) (The cheesy potatoes I'm talking about... you can find that recipe HERE. They are yummy!) And here's our pretty little lady in her Easter outfit on her very first Easter! 

 And guess what? This momma got a SMILE from her for the camera! The very first one (that wasn't when she was sleeping and the angels were talking to her ;)) 

 And our sweet Tayler was born on my Aunt Kelly's 49th birthday! So, OF COURSE, the birthday girls got their picture taken yesterday. Tayler was completely oblivious (the only time she woke up was when she needed to eat, haha!!) but here is a picture of her and her Great Aunt Kelly! 

 Tayler also got 2 Easter baskets yesterday... and nope, neither one was from us. Yes, I felt like a wretched parent, but I had no idea what you did for a newborn? Well, I found out yesterday, haha.... Here's her Easter baskets from her Aunt Jennifer and my parents. (Apparently you get new borns clothes and books! Now I know for future reference ;)) 

 We took a picture yesterday of 4 generations too :) In the picture is my paternal grandma, my daddy, me, and Tayler-Bug! Grandma said,  "Don't get my face in the picture..." (we nodded and said, yeah okay Grandma) haha! Yes, her face is in the picture. (She also told us we weren't allowed to put it in the paper... we'll see how well we follow those rules *wink wink*) 

 And let me tell you a story about this picture: 

My cousin Leeann was holding Tayler and she was standing next to the chair where my dad was sitting. Well, my dad had been patiently waiting to hold Tayler and was finally getting the chance. Leeann said she was going to pass Tayler over to him, so I turned my head and continued on with the women's discussion we were having. All of a sudden, I heard "OH MY GOSH" and looked over and all I saw out of my peripheral vision was blue (what Tayler was wearing) and a baby falling! I screamed, Makala screamed, and then I started bawling. My brother had that DUMB baby and dropped it on the floor.. acting like he had dropped Tayler... I nearly came un-glued. I laughed... through the tears. I had never been so scared. What a butthead right? I know, you can all say it!! haha!!

We had a wonderful Easter! So glad to finally be spending a holiday WITH Tayler on the outside of my belly, hehe! :) Hope you all had a great day too!

 PS-- If you have a Facebook, could you do me a favor? Could you add "Jessica Barber Photography"... go to her photo album "Mother's Day Photo Contest" and LIKE the picture of Tayler and me? (We're the first picture... the first time I held her after giving birth to her :)) THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! It's going to help us win a photo session for Mother's Day! 

Blog Challenge Day 2

 2.Which is worse, failing or never trying?

For me, never trying is worse. And honestly, I'm not sure if that's for personal reasons or for public reasons. Lets be honest-- no one likes to see the face of disappointment, ESPECIALLY from the people who they are closest to. So, I will purposefully try everything I can to succeed so that if I DON'T succeed (I know.. terrible pessimistic thinking here... oops!) I can still say-- Hey, I tried everything I could!  (Who wants to be talking about a situation and have to say 'No, I didn't try that...' Embarrassing and frustrating!) I hate seeing people disappointed in me (and I hate being disappointed in myself!!!) so I'd rather try, try, try, and then try again and fail, fail, fail... then have to live with the fact that I didn't even try at all!  If you're interested in reading other ladies' answers to these questions, check out these girls that I know who are also participating in this challenge: Emily
Brittany
Taryn 
Happy Easter all of my blog readers! I'll post an Easter update later, of course!