You're Gonna Miss This

Tayler has been struggling with fussiness at night time. I have refused to claim that it is colic. However, she appears to get fussy and start screaming/crying about 6:30PM and it stops about 9:30PM/10:30PM. Now, I will say this-- she is an amazing sleeper. Once she falls asleep at 9:30PM/10:30PM, she doesn't wake up again til about 3:30AM, then not again til about 6:30-8:00AM. She lets us sleep in periods and it is amazing... it's just getting through this screaming/crying period we have at night time.

I'll be honest with you here... I have been getting frustrated. It has been going on for about 2 weeks... and it is really starting to wear on me. Our nights are spent driving around, playing music... trying to keep her occupied. I find myself crying through most of the car ride... praying that God would give her some kind of peace. I don't get angry with her or anything like that. I know she can't help it. I just get frustrated because I can't help her :( I try and try, but it just doesn't work...

Tonight, I put her in the car and drove around with her trying to get her to calm down. We'd been driving for almost an hour and she was still crying... I broke down.. I just didn't know what to do for her anymore and then the songs on my Ipod changed... to "You're Gonna Miss This."

In this song, Trace Adkins sings:

"Five years later there's a plumber workin' on the water heater
Dog's barkin', phone's ringin'
One kid's cryin', one kid's screamin'
She keeps apologizin'
He says they don't bother me
I've got 2 babies of my own
One's 36, one's 23
Huh, it's hard to believe

But you're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this
You're gonna miss this
Yeah, you're gonna miss this"

And of course, I cried even more.

This is a trying time right now. It wears on you, but I know... that when she's 18 years old.. walking across that stage to graduate.. I'm going to miss those car rides... I'm going to miss rocking her to sleep and singing to her even through the screams. I'm going to miss blaring Kari Jobe and singing at the top of my lungs because that's the only way she stops at times. I'm going to miss holding her... period.

God, forgive me for getting frustrated sometimes. Forgive me for forgetting that these are precious moments.. even when they are trying. Let me remember that one day, I'll miss this... so let me not wish that it would leave.. just give me the strength to get through it. Let me take those times and embrace them. Let me learn to enjoy them... even when it is hard.

Full Day as MOM

 Since Tayler was born, I haven't had a full day alone with her. Fortunately, Ethan had the week after she was born off and then my mom came and stayed the week after that, since Ethan had to go back to work. So, that meant yesterday, Monday, April 18th, was my first full day alone with Tayler (from 5AM to about 5PM)... I know that doesn't sound like a lot to you super moms out there, but I was really nervous. I wanted to still be that housewife/mommy that had the house cleaned, laundry done, and dinner on the table when Ethan came home from work AND still take care of Tayler... And you all will be happy to know that it was a success! :) During her first nap (about 9AM), I cleaned/sterilized her bottles, did the dishes, and cooked the bacon for the BLTs later. I figured that I could do it while she was asleep as opposed to hoping and praying she was napping when it was time to make dinner. :) I also got 2 loads of laundry done, scrubbed the bath rub, straightened up.. and Tayler and I had time to sit on the porch swing. She LOVES the outdoors... she was basking in the sunlight: 

We enjoyed it! :)

Once we came inside, I made BLTs for dinner. Well, since Ethan doesn't like tomatos, I guess they were BLs haha! And we had salads with them. Nothing like some healthy eating, right?

And I had a little photoshoot with my sweetheart. Here are some pictures of our little lady:

Her daddy bought her that onesie-- he calls her "squirmy" so it fit perfectly, haha!

On another note-- have you ever heard about babies at about 2 weeks old getting extremely fussy in the evening? According to some information I was reading:

"Most babies have a fussy period in the evening. After a day of taking in the sights, sounds and physical handling he may dissolve into a good cry."

Tayler has seemed to become fussy in the evenings. It starts at about 6:30PM and doesn't end until she finally cries herself to sleep. I don't believe it's colic because she isn't inconsolable. She just needs comforted. If I'm holding her or swaddling her, she is alright. I have been praying for peace to compass her because she isn't typically a fussy baby. I hate seeing her like that :( Someone also mentioned that her fussiness right now could be because of a growth spurt which I suppose is possible.

If you are going through something similar, check out this link: http://www.bosombuddies.com/SupportPagesFolder/FussyBaby.html

It has helped us :)

All in all, it was a wonderful day! I am so in love with that little girl and I'm so thankful I have the privilege of being at home with her.